


Home Again

by enbied



Category: Degrassi
Genre: Angst, Fluff, M/M, triles
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-03
Updated: 2016-12-02
Packaged: 2018-04-07 10:39:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,070
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4260168
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/enbied/pseuds/enbied
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Miles gets home from boarding school and runs straight into Tristan's arms.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [buttrileskissed](https://archiveofourown.org/users/buttrileskissed/gifts).
  * Inspired by [Homesick](https://archiveofourown.org/external_works/124995) by heartbreakersworth. 



> A spin-off of Homesick by heartbreakersworth/buttrileskissed found here -  
> http://www.fanfiction.net/s/11113699/1/Homesick

Furiously peppering kisses all over Tristan’s lips, jaw and neck, Miles had forgotten all about the bags he had abandoned running into Tristan’s arms.

“Oh, my god, calm down, we’ve got ten days!”

“It’s – not – enough,” Miles managed between pecks.

“Okay, I appreciate the sentiment but you’re _kind_ of acting like a slobbery dog right now,” Tristan laughed, aware of the swarms of onlookers smirking at the pair.

With one final lingering kiss on Tristan’s (smiling, perfect) lips, Miles moved back and sighed, smiling even wider.

“Sorry.  Lots of adrenaline.  I’ve been excited for today ever since I left.  God, I love you.”

“Aw, come here.”  Tristan pulled him into the tightest hug in human history, allowing Miles to again breathe in Tristan’s sweet vanilla cologne, the familiar scent of home.  “I don’t know how _I’m_ so composed.  I guess I’m waiting until we – mh –” he was interrupted by Miles pulling away and stealing his lips again, “– get to the car.”

“Oh yeah?  And what are we going to do in this car?”  Miles resumed his battering on Tristan’s neck.

“Well, we can do whatever we want in this car, provided it’s not illegal to do in an airport parking garage.”

“Damnit! That’s like, nothing!”

“Then we’ll drive back to my house.  I asked everyone to be out so…”

“We can…?” Miles confirmed, lowering his voice though anyone listening into the conversation would already have worked out the nature of the discussion by now.

“If you want…” He replied with a soft smile.

Miles’ expression turned serious. “D-do you want…?”

“ _Yes_ , Miles, _duh_!” Tristan rolled his eyes, then pressed a finger to his partner’s chest.  ” _But,_ it has to be good.”

Mocking offence, Miles stepped back and crossed his arms. “I’m always good!”

“I mean _special_ ,” Tristan unfolded his boyfriend’s arms and placed them around his own waist.  “Slow.”

“Loving?”

Tristan drew in a tentative breath.  “Well, I – I’m trying not to say it right now.”

“I noticed.  Why?”

“Because I want it to be…” he bit his lip in concentration, trying to find the right words.  “I don’t want it to be because you just got back.  I want to be a hundred percent sure that it’s right.  And _I’m_ not doing it over video chat, like _one of us_ here did.”

Miles said nothing, just gently pawed at the leather of Tristan’s jacket.

“Oh, come on; don’t get all dejected on me.  It should be a moment of its own, don’t you think?”

“When _will_ it be?  Next week?  Next summer?  The year after that when I’m home for good?”

“Stop it.”

The taller boy’s jaw tightened and his eyes glazed over, broken voice choking out, “I just want you to love me back.”

“Miles, I – no, I can’t, not like this.”

“Can we just go home?”  The brunet withdrew his arms and turned away to retrieve his bags, Tristan following close behind.

“Hey, you know I care about you.  And I feel it so much, I do, I want to say it more than anything.  But _I can’t do it now_.”

“Why?”

“I told you why.”

“Is that the real reason?”

“Yes – I know how much it meant to you and, I want to mean it as much as you did.  Why are you being like this?”

“Because I just spent the longest time away from you, and from home, and a lot of things went wrong.  I just wanted to know at least I had you.”

“You _do_ have me.” Tristan emphasised.

“Do I? Because it really seems like you’re just putting off leaving me.”

“Where the hell did this come from?  I came all the way out here to be with you the second you got home, I’m doing everything I can to spend time with you - and you think I don’t want you?!”  Tristan shook his head, equal parts confused, affronted and fond of the boy scowling at the ground behind him.  Once he realised Miles wasn’t going to talk, he gave him a few seconds to cool off before deciding it was time to reach out and wind his fingers through Miles’.  To his surprise, the brunet gripped tight onto his hand and, with misting eyes, finally met his eye.

“You’ll _always_ have me.”  The raven haired boy stroked his free hand through his partner’s hair, who brought their foreheads together and closed his eyes.  “I’m so sorry I made you feel like that, Miles.”

The taller boy took a deep breath in an attempt to repress the lump in his throat.  The past few months had been lonely for him to say the least.  Despite putting in some effort he hadn’t made any friends and the resulting time spent studying alone did nothing to improve his grades.  The only thing he had to look forward to was video chatting with Tristan.  They couldn’t even text for being in different countries, so every interaction they had was given more significance than it should have had.

“No, Tris, I overreacted, I’m sorry.  I’m just paranoid.  Feels like you’re the only one I haven’t lost.”

“It’s been a big day. Why don’t we go home and do…” Tristan shrugged, “whatever we end up doing.”

“Sounds good.  But – can we just go back to mine for a minute?  I want to see the twins.”

“Sure.”  A smile grew on Tristan’s face remembering how Miles behaved around his siblings.  He was always so protective – if anyone said a bad word about either of them he’d stare icicles into them, although he teased the pair affectionately.  Tristan picked up one of the bags at their feet, and with a tug of their connected hands, he began to guide Miles in the direction of the car.

“Wait, wait.”

“Yeah?”  Tristan turned to face Miles again.

“I’m sorry.  Like, really.”

Hearing Miles repeat his apology reminded Tristan that Miles was truly troubled by the exchange.  Tristan dropped the bag and placed the hand on the other’s cheek, heartened by the genuine concern written on his boyfriend’s face.

“It’s okay.  We’ll work it out.  I’m not done with you just yet,” he teased.

“Good.”  Miles’ reply was barely audible, simply a reflex response as he made a conscious effort to keep his eyes on Tristan’s.  He had missed those grey-blue eyes, their fire, their ice, and especially the lovely convergence between the two as they melted for him.  But at this particular moment, he was struggling not to let his focus shift to Tristan’s smooth, full lips.

As if reading his mind, the darker haired boy’s hand traced along his jaw to cup his chin as he pressed a soft kiss to his boyfriend’s mouth, lingering on his bottom lip.  When the kiss ended, Tristan brushed aside Miles’ fringe to reveal a longing expression, and knew exactly what he was thinking.

“I know.  Me too.”

Miles nodded, still seeming unsure.

“It’ll be a surprise when I do say it, though.  You’ll never see it coming.”

The rich boy gave a faint smile and moved in for another kiss but Tristan dodged, grabbing the bag he had been carrying and dragging his frustrated partner along.

“What, we can’t walk and kiss?”

“I _wish_.  I’d forget where I parked.”


	2. angst and slightly ooc miles per usual

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> also per usual i'm posting this to clear out my drafts but you don't have to read it so

Noticing Miles’ unhappy demeanour despite his favourite West Drive character being on screen, Tristan shifted closer and wrapped an arm around his shoulder.

“Hey. Come on. It’s a happy time! You’re home, we’re still the same as we were yesterday...”

“I just – feel like – _fuck_. Today was supposed to be so good and I screwed it up.”

“No, don’t s –”

“I shouldn’t have brought up the whole love thing; I should have just left it.”

(tris turns the tv off)

“I understand why you did.  Being apart brought up all these insecurities in us –”

“I’m not insecure.”

“Okay, not _insecure_ ,” Tristan continued carefully.

“Fine, you’re right, I am.”

Tristan smiled slightly to himself.  “I know.  And that’s normal. It’s _okay_.”

“No, it isn’t!” Miles exploded, finally making the briefest of eye contact only to break it, ashamed at having yelled. “Not for me.”

Tristan was silent, watching the other boy patiently.

“Fuck, Tris, I’m supposed to be the strong one.  I have to be.  Frankie and Hunter, I already left them behind, they need to see me _not care._  At least when I’m home.”

“I’m not them.” Pause. “I don’t need that from you.  I – I kinda need the opposite, I need you to talk to me.  Hell, if you cried on my shoulder I’d be thrilled.”

Miles shoots him a silent, sad glance.

“Alright.” Tris reached under Miles’ arms and pulled him onto his lap to minimal, albeit confused protest, stretching them both across the couch. “You’ve had a long day, and you’re feeling grumpy and sorry for yourself, so what we’re going to do is either talk about our feelings or go to sleep.  Your choice.”

“It’s not ‘my choice’,” Miles grumbled, shifting for comfort. “I can’t _just_ _talk_ about feelings and whatever.  I’m not like that.”

“You kinda just did,” Tristan offered.

Miles half laughed. “I don’t want to say this again.  You already know how I feel.”

“Say what?” Tristan gently squeezed his arms around Miles’ chest.

The brunet didn’t look at him when he responded.

“That I love you, and I’m _in_ love with you, and – even though I know you feel it too, it still hurts like hell to not hear you say it back.”

Tristan felt a pang of guilt fizzle in his stomach. He pushed it down, trying to stay level-headed. “Why?”

“Why, what?”

“Tell me why it hurts.”

Miles looked at the ceiling, confused, speechless. “I – because – it just _does_.”

“If you know I feel it why do you need the words right now? Why is now better than any other moment when we’re happy?” Tristan began tracing long fingers across Miles’ chest.

“Because until you say it I’m always going to be preoccupied with waiting and hoping.  I can’t just… be happy.  To be with you.”

“If I say it right now you won’t be happy with that either,”  Tristan reminded him.

Miles said nothing, a silent admission that he knew Tristan was right, but after a moment, he spoke.

“Will it be while I’m here?”

Tristan’s fingers faltered but he soon returned to his rhythm, choosing to remain silent.

When he was sure Tristan wasn’t going to answer, Miles turned over to rest his face in the dip in Tristan’s neck and wrap a defensive arm around him.

Miles fell asleep first, Tristan doing his best to stay awake just to make sure he was alright, still gently scratching comforting shapes over Miles’ skin.

* * *

 

Miles awoke to Tristan shifting himself out from underneath his weight. He could see his look of apprehension even in the dark, the way he was biting his lip as if he’d been debating whether to move.

As Miles felt himself being relocated onto the couch alone, he made a noise, needy and – maybe it was a whine, a fearful complaint at whatever was taking Tristan away from him.

“Bathroom,” Tristan reassured, brushing a hand over Miles’ shoulder as he passed.

Starting forward to catch Tristan’s fingers, Miles repeats the noise, wanting a kiss as he always did in any and every situation.

With a knowing smile spreading across his face, Tristan sat back down beside Miles.

“We’re okay,” he said simply, and granted Miles his unspoken wish, placing his hand on the side of his boyfriend’s face as they shared a sweet, affectionate kiss.


	3. also how it happened

“Tristan, I’m in love with you.”

“Miles, oh my god,” he breathed.

“You don’t have to say it back, I just need you to know.”

“You’re telling me this and I can’t even kiss you?”

“I tried to wait, I really did, I’m sorry.  It felt like a lie not to tell you ‘cause I was sure.”

“I can’t believe you’re apologising right now…” Tristan replied, dazed.

“Right, sorry.  Shit, sorry.”

(both laugh at adorkable miles)

“Miles, I – I want to be _with_ you, I’m so sorry, I can’t, not now…”

“I get it.  No, it’s cool.”

“You sure?”

“It doesn’t have to change anything, we can just keep talking about whatever, if you want.”

“Oh my god,” he breathed again, looking at his hands, then back at his screen. “You mean it?”

“Yes, I mean it,” he laughed affectionately. “I love you, Tris.”


End file.
